Can taking a break from your relationship save you?

I know that certain things in life must come to an end and there comes a time when we have to let things go… But is it possible to let go of something and still keep it? Taking a break is like being together and being apart at the same time - can it work? Should we take a break?

Some people get extremely dramatic and hasty when it comes to ending a relationship: they cry and shout and break things but, in spite of all the drama, their souls remain attached. They might take some time apart but they miss each other, they do everything in their power to “accidentally” run into each other and the distance helps them see things more clearly and the tension slowly disappears. They stay together for they were meant to be together.

Others ask for time to think and slowly disappear. Everything gets a little blurry until you can’t even remember what it felt like to be with them. But that invisible connection might still be there and you miss them and it hurts like hell. They start a new life, get involved in new things but you’re still exactly where you were. In cases like this, taking a break acts as a catalyst and brings on the inevitable.

“I think we should take a break.” It’s so easy to utter these words when you’re feeling tired and hopeless, when all your energy is consumed by endless arguments, dealing with things you should have never said out loud and your ego telling you you’re right, when it feels like your relationship is a never ending battle of two selfish people. It becomes a little too much after a while, you give up talking and nothing ever changes. “I think we should take a break”, we say. But we don’t do it for us. What we actually mean is we need to end it calmly and quietly.

What I see is that taking a break is more often than not the end of it. Sometimes it’d be much nicer to simply end things - arguments do not resolve themselves by not talking about the issues at hand. What we actually need is to sit down and talk about things in a loving and respectful manner even if it might end in separation. You’re just wasting your time while you’re on a break, plus it’s very emotionally draining for the both of you. Taking a break will not solve anything, taking action will. You must make up your mind whether you’re willing to work on your relationship or not. It might be time to pack your things and go: staying in a toxic relationship will not benefit either of you.

Can taking a break save your relationship? Well, the things is people who say it’s time to take a break are just too scared to end things and what they actually mean is it’s time to move on, they just don’t know how to tell you that. Taking a break is nothing more than a break up you’re not willing to face. The only time being on a break can actually help you is when you know how long it is going to last and both of you take the time to think about redefining your relationship and never stop communicating how you feel. Sometimes people do need to take a step back and look at things from another perspective to see things clearly and to be able to decide whether to stay together or not. Getting away from all the drama might help you to become less emotional and much more reasonable. But it must end with you two making a conscious decision to choose what’s best.

When you already know your relationship is over but you’re too scared to admit it, taking a break is merely a delayed breakup

“I think we should take a break”, we say. It’s nothing more than holding on to what’s left of us for a little while longer hoping never to deal with ending it. It might leave the other person hoping and believing but they are just as scared as you are - saying you need to take a break is, in fact, one of the most selfish ways to end a relationship that was once built on your love and respect for each other.

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